Sunday, August 26, 2007

the funk of corpses in the air.

i beat BioShock this morning around ten something after being up since three something in the morning. correction, yesterday, since it's technically sunday now.

took took four and a half days to beat. great game. i got the happy ending. time to replay to get the other two endings and attempt to unlock the shit i didn't get before.

got an amazingly great copy of, "superbad," which if i haven't stated, is easily the funniest film i've seen in a long while. i don't think there was a moment i didn't laugh. it was written so perfectly, and it just meshed and blended with my entire sense of humor, and it had the heart at the end that it needed to propel itself from being just another R rated comedy.

i think it's a safe assumption to make in saying that the one movie i've been looking forward to seeing for the past year is finally coming to fruition this friday. rob zombie's, "halloween."

in gearing up for the event, i download the soundtrack which isn't nearly as good as his, "devil's rejects," soundtrack, but good none the less. i'm not big on adding dialogue from the film to a soundtrack cd, but, to each his own. i just feel it adds a false pretense to the film's outline.

i also bought, "halloween," the original carpenter classic on dvd, as well as the two disc documentary, "halloween: 25 years of terror." they both came with a free ticket to see the new zombie flick.



i'm so engulfed in zombie's vision, i've been downloading supposed, "drafts," of the script, which are all obviously different, though unique, in attempt to get a better understanding of what he wants to achieve in the film.

i like the idea that he wants to give michael an identity. a backstory. why he is the way he is, why he wears, "the mask," and so on and so forth, whereas john carpenter's vision was more meant to be more simple in that, you put a man in a mask who doesn't speak, just moves, and kills. a force, as carpenter called it, of just mass destruction with no reason behind it. meaning it's more terrifying to not know anything about a man who seems to kill with no intent or emotion. and he was right... in 1978.

i'm just stoked to see another zombie film. i like the guy as a filmmaker. he's good at it. sue me.

and now... re-watch, "the office," season two... only another week to get through for season three's release. spank yo momma...

oh yeah, one more thing. a treat for you's all... can you guess which young mullet wearer in this fred savage classic, "the wizard," went onto play everyone's favorite webslinger?

Friday, August 24, 2007

"that's the big daddy... he protects the little sister..."

this game...



is unfuckinbelievablyfuckinridiculously AMAZING!

there have been a handful of 360 games that have come out that have really held my attention, to the point of not really sleeping during my regular sleep hours during the work week, just so i could play said game/games.

BIOSHOCK is definetly one of the many.

let's put a head on the list of 360 titles to really get me going:

-crackdown.
-condemned: criminal origins.
-peter jackson's king kong [the first game based on a film that was better than the film.]
-gears of war.
-the darkness.

i'm sure there are others, but i've been up since three in the morning with it being six eighteen now, and i'm heading into an eight and a half hour work day that will directly be followed by a shower, cold bottle of beer, and the next however many hours i pump into playing this game.

i'll go into more specifics at a later date.

also, there may be a dust and snow bi-weekly comic coming, written by myself, and illustrated by my friend chris, ala wrathofconn.

let the FRIDAY COMMENCE! VIVA RAPTURE!

Sunday, August 19, 2007

"this is a glimpse into what your life could be..."

friday i drove in search of getting a beanbag. i do a lot of my gaming in the livingroom, and i need a big, cushiony beanbag to sit in while geeking out... however, no one seems to have beanbags. target, nor walmart. bummer.

i did cave in and spend twenty bucks on, "the aqua teen hunger force colon movie."

i didn't care for it much when i saw it in theaters, and in some aspects, still don't, but it comes with a bonus disc with an 80 minute deleted movie, that essentially is another cut of the flick, and is much funnier. carl is funnier. as well as shake.

the following image, is a shot i took with the digital cam, of my tv, to show you the new game i love on xbox live arcade... 3d Ultra Mini-Golf rules...



in three and a half hours, i'll be at amc watching, "superbad." that's how i'm spending my sunday morning. watching a vulgar comedy. i'm pretty sure jesus is cool with it.

i think i've made the decision to never go to church again, unless it's for something for a friend or family member. and it's not because i've lost my faith... i just don't see the point anymore. i get annoyed with church. i hate standing in the morning for fifteen minutes listening to people sing music that i really don't enjoy, and then sitting for the next hour to an hour and a half listening to someone, boringly talk scriptures and find a way to incorporate them into current events. i've read the bible. i have belief and faith in my heart. enough said.

going to church is like going to a sexual harrasment meeting at work. you know what to expect, you know what's coming, you know right from wrong, but still, you're insisted on going to somehow clarify that you're not a complete fuckhead. whatever...

cee-lo from gnarls barkley/musical genius has a new side project coming out called, "heart attack." i'm always last to hear about cool shit like this, but i did get a four track sampler of what heart attack sounds like, and it's really good, seventies-like soul music. i look forward to hearing the full album.

Friday, August 17, 2007

going back to rehab.

tonight, i'm depressed. not sure why. i'm gonna keep listening to sage francis throughout the evening, keep a steady dose of painkillers in my system, and possibly go to some thrift stores and maybe eat at papa john's... i'm just gonna go for a drive...

Saturday, August 11, 2007

ice monster and chainsaw granados...

first off, my phone stopped working, so, i get everyone's messages, but i cannot call, so, yeah. sorry. not much i can do about that. i'm broke. phoneless i shall be.

my right testicle is still sore. not as bad mind you as the day i entered the e.r., but it's, and i know this sounds funny, but the only word i can find, is, tender. it really feels like some alien hybrid is in my body... i half excpect gillian anderson and david duchovny to waltz in and tell me i'm proof of the alien testicular conspiracy... speaking of, word from both of them is a script is written, and x-files 2 starts filming in november... supposedly a veer from the alien conspiracy, this is gonna be a straight-forward horror flick. nice.

since i've been doped up and whatnot, i began listening to more music, and playing old games.

resident evil 4. gamecube.

i've beat the game four times straight through, and to this day in lingers in the top 5 greatest games i've ever played. however, i have not been playing the story mode, but rather, working my way through, "the mercanaries."

i've unlocked all characters on a four star rating with the exception of one...



every time i go to complete the fourth map that will unlock him, this douchebag always get's me with a head lop-off...



the chainsaw granado is the hardest fucker in the game for me. he moves so fast it's unreal.

minus the bear, one of my favorite bands, put this album out this year...



i recommend not only getting it, but seeking out the four track e.p. bonus album that came with certain prints. it's just as good as their first LP, "highly refined pirates," way better than their last LP, "menos el oso," and as good as the remix album released for, "menos el oso."

minus the bear is just an amazing melodic rock/indie band.

i'm waiting on two downloads. "smokin' aces," and, "lollilove." i look forward to watching those movies.

also, black, seedless grapes from sweetbay are amazingly delicious, and, i had forgotten how much i loved cauliflower. i'm on this fruit and veggie kick. the testy thing kinda scared me into eating healthier...

Thursday, August 09, 2007

stranglehold.

seeing as how i'm still sore, i took one extra day off from work. i've never really felt a soreness like this before...

so, my day will be spent sitting, legs open, on the couch, playing, "double agent."

i did however, want to comment on a demo i got off xbox live.

john woo's, "stranglehold," starring, in pixel form, chow yun fat.



i had no desire from the time i read about this game in, "game informer," until this morning, to really play this game. it just didn't seem my cup of tea... however, i do enjoy free demos, and decided, why not.

what i got, was unexpected.

the graphics are nothing special considering the console, but the controls and story alone are incredible. the controls more so than the story. and that's an oddity for me to exclaim seeing as how i'm a whore for story, but the barrage of neat things you can do with your character aptly named, "inspector tequila," yes, it's a sequel to woo's '92 film, "hard boiled," is just amazing.

you have a bullet time sort of thing, but you can slide down rail posts and go into your bullet time, and then at the same time, jump and dive while firing round after round into hong kong baddies, and then right as you come to the bottom of the railing, land on a four wheel watermelon cart, and go sliding around on your belly while on the cart, blasting enemies. it's fucking sweet.

you can jump backwards, land on your back, and just stay on the ground rolling around blasting fuckers in the balls or the head.

and my personal favorite, this thing called stand-off, where when you get surrounded by four or more guys, you go into this first person, slow motion perspective, popping off rounds, while matrix like dodging theirs.

you can enter this bomb mode, and signal in on a certain area of their body, i like the headshots, fire a round, and watch it from the bullets perspective as it marks a nice hole where it lands, pouring blood out everywhere.

this is the first demo i ever played all the way through. i seriously couldn't find myself able to put the controller down.

a rare gem thought to be shit, will be owned by me the end of this month. next week i get, "bioshock," and i'm definetly trading in some stuff for, "stranglehold."

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

casanova douchenstein and the immeasurable, persistent dream.

i'm not going to go into detail, but yesterday, i was in the e.r. of lee memorial hospital... i had severe pains in my right testicle that could have been a number of possibilities including, but not limited to:

-hernia.
-kidney stone.
-some weird thing where the testicle actually twists around and gets infected resulting in emergency surgery to remove said testicle, this was the one they were most concerned about... how's it's not worse than the one below is beyond me...

or... the worst, testicular cancer.

in the end, it was epididymitis that had poisoned my body. an early stage to a nasty infection located inbetween my sperm duct and urinary tract.

to end this swiftly, i'm gonna be okay, knock on wood, as long as the antibiotics are of use. i was put on an antibiotic and a heavy dosage of percocet that is so high, i get nauseous.

today i fell asleep while watching the x-files and had a dream that has been recurring the past two weeks, and it essentially involves hanging out with nicholas cage, running my own comedy club, and somehow at the end of the dream, every time, there's a scenario where i'm trying to be with my ex again. it's always at her son's birthday party, and i'm not sure why i continue to dream this is some form or another.

it's funny how when you're awake, you're so sure of your views, choices, and perspectives, yet when we fall into slumber, we see this other side that confuses us when we wake.

the following movies i recently saw that i enjoyed:

-hannibal rising.
-doctor strange. [animated]
-the invincible iron man. [animated]
-hot rod. [i know... i can believe it either, but it made me laugh... and i hate andy samberg.]

the new iron & wine e.p. is really good...

The kettle burned cause I left it too long
and we were kissing with the radio on
the cat was choking on a rattle snake bone
the town had gathered round the soldier boy carried home

carried home...

The sick kids ate up all the red clay
and every summer there was imminent rain
the late judge teetered in a john boat
the town had gathered round the soldier boy carried home

carried home...

The broken window and the pretty blue sky
and cold water for my swollen black eye
we shook some money from your mother's old clothes
when all had gathered round the soldier boy carried home

carried home...

Sunday, August 05, 2007

missing home.

it's funny how a little sufjan stevens, some ice cream, and endless memories can bring you back to a place you hated so much when you were young, but love so dearly when you're old enough to know better.

i was born at dickenson county memorial hospital on april 2, 1980. that's located in iron mountain, michigan, which directly connects with or through: quinnesec, norway, and kingsford, MI., as well as aurora, and niagara, WI.

i lived in kingsford for the better part of my youth before moving to florida.

i also lived in crystal falls, MI., which is on the outskirts of where i was born, in the middle of the forest more or less. regardless of where it all was, it was all a part of the U.P... the upper peninsula.

the people that live in the upper peninsula have become more commonly known as, "yoopers," thanks to a local traveling comedy/music group properly titled, "da yoopers."

a yooper to me is a combination of a canadian, a little hillbilly, and a good chunk of frozen brain matter. because anyone who lives up in that weather will tell you, to live in that cold, you'd have to be brain dead. but oddly enough, the love i have for the cold is one thing florida cannot take from me.

even though my definition of a yooper is my own, there are others who have dedicated their lives to digging into the historical values of a yooper which you can read more about at the link i put at the bottom of this post.

yoopers have a distinct accent. it's sorta canadian fused with a north dakota/minnesota accent... like, "heya, oh yah, donchaknow..." my mom has the queen of yooper accents, and both of my uncle gary's tower with thick yooper men accents. my cousins as well. i have one that only comes out when i'm visiting up there... my voice deepens and pronounces everything at a yooper decibel.

the upper peninsula truly is a world of it's own that if you haven't experienced in it's essence on your own with your own eyes, ears, and nose, then you will never understand what i mean.

for me, growing up their as a kid, the closest, and i mean, the closest, not gospel mind you, but closest thing i can compare it to in terms to being a kid, is the movie, "a christmas story."

the schools, the snow, the kids, the awful snow suits we were forced to wear to school on winter days... that shits all true.

i haven't seen it, but my mom tells me jeff daniels movie, "escanaba in da moon light," is a good interpretation of life in the U.P.

i began writing this with the nostalgic notion of my life there, and how even though i'm grateful i'm somewhere outside of the U.P., that deep inside, there's a part of me that misses it dearly. part of me wants to move back and live there among old friends that never left, and family that's just as nutty as i've grown to be...

i miss things like this so very much...



if you really want to find out more about who i was born to and where i really come from, go here... and no, this is no joke... this is how people from the upper peninsula are... trust me, i'm related to them...

da yoopers dat com

Thursday, August 02, 2007

frustrations.

my vacation for the year, my one week to myself, had it's phasers set to boner cool... the new coheed and cambria album came out this particular week in question, along with part two of the final sopranos dvd season six set, and... also... GRAND THEFT AUTO 4! but... now... this just in via 1up.com...

GTA IV Delayed Until Spring 2008
Rockstar says it needs more time to finish the game.
By Sam Kennedy, 08/02/2007


This just in... Take-Two has announced that Grand Theft Auto IV is being delayed until Spring of 2008 due to "additional development time required to complete the title." We'll have more on this story shortly, but here are a bit of the explanations that came with today's announcement:

"With Grand Theft Auto IV, Rockstar is setting a new standard for next generation video games," stated Strauss Zelnick, Chairman of Take-Two. "Certain elements of development proved to be more time-intensive than expected, especially given the commitment for a simultaneous release on two very different platforms. We all recognize that perfecting the game is vital and I can assure everyone it will be worth the wait. We owe it to the game's millions of fans, to our dedicated development team, and to our shareholders to make sure that Grand Theft Auto IV is a groundbreaking gaming experience that takes maximum advantage of next generation technology."

"The new consoles are allowing us to create the Grand Theft Auto game we always dreamed about," added Sam Houser, Founder and Executive Producer of Rockstar Games. "Every aspect of the game and its design has been completely transformed. The game is huge and is pushing the hardware platforms to their absolute limits. The top engineers from Sony and Microsoft are working closely with the team in Edinburgh right now, helping us to fully leverage the power of both platforms. As always, our goal is to surpass even the wildest expectations of the game's fans, and to create the ultimate high definition video game experience."

Stay tuned for more on this story as we get it.


well fuck me... should i bother taking a vacation now? i don't think so... i had plan to utilize that week at the end of october, beginning of november to immerse in gta goodness of bloodshed and prostitution, and now... no... first manhunt 2, and now this... at least i got bioshock this month... i hope...

and now... the trailer for the aqua teen hunger force game coming to ps2...

other forms of fun.


why not buy one of the many items i need, and give it to me for being awesome?...

My Amazon.com Wish List

i'm live too... what's your gaming skills like?